Send me a sign 08

Anotace: ...

Sbírka: Send me a sign

8

 

„Did you talk to Lena?“ Fred asked Eric on Friday as they headed for the parking lot after their afternoon shift.

 

„Not yet,“ Eric answered, glancing at him.

 

„See you on Monday,“ Fred shrugged, patting Eric's shoulder.

 

„See you,“ Eric waved at him and walked to his car.

 

Last few days he was thinking a lot about everything. As his anger faded away he concluded that everything began with his departure. He realized he'd ruined everything. Even though he was still convinced that Lena should have told him about being a father he got his emotions under control.

 

He arrived home. Closing the door behind him he was standing in his empty flat and realized how much he missed Lena, Ellie and his mom. He pulled a bottle of water out of the fridge and sat down on the couch. Unscrewing the lid he drank from the bottle and put it on the table. He felt so lonely. He decided he had to do anything and everything to fix it.

 

He grabbed his car keys and walked out of the apartment.

 

*

 

The door opened and Jeremy was standing there.

 

„Hi Jeremy,“ Eric ran his hand through his hair. „I'm sorry, I know it's late but I'd like to talk to Lena.“

 

„Hi, come in,“ he stepped aside. „Lena went to pick up your mom. She's visiting her friend here in Wildwood. So I'm babysitting,“ he smiled. „You can wait for her here.“ Eric followed him hesitantly. „Would you like a cup of coffee?“ Jeremy didn't wait for the answer and poured coffee into two mugs. Then he led him to the living room. „I heard what happened on Monday here,“ he brought up as they settled on the couch. „Do you want to talk about it?“

 

„I'm not sure,“ Eric shook his head. „It was terrible. Did you know that Ellie... that I...,“ he broke off.

 

„Yes, I did, Eric. You know... Ellie was born a week after I'd found my sister. I took her to the hospital back then,“ Jeremy said in a low voice.

 

„I should have been there,“ Eric sighed. He looked around. „Is she sleeping?“

 

„Yes, she is,“ Jeremy nodded. „It had to be painful for you to find out like that but it wasn't Lena's fault.“

 

„I know. I thought about it the last few days. She wanted to talk to me on Tuesday but I wasn't ready for it yet,“ Eric took a sip from his mug. „I miss them as hell.“

 

„I think they miss you, too. But she loves you, man,“ Jeremy leaned his back against the couch. „She's never dated anyone even though men were interested in her.“

 

„She's unbelievable, I know,“ Eric sighed. „Well, I should go. I'll call her tomorrow,“ he got up and Jeremy walked him to the front door. „Thank you,“ he glanced at Jeremy.

 

„You're welcome,“ Jeremy shook his hand.

 

Eric opened the door to walk out and there was Lena standing in front of him, the keys in her hand. She held her breath for a moment. „Eric?“

 

Mary walked in and hugged him. „I'm so sorry, Eric.“

 

Eric hugged her back, his eyes locked with Lena's. „It was not your fault, mom. It's OK,“ he let her go and walked outside.

 

„Are you leaving?“ Lena asked quietly, seeing with one corner of her eyes as Jeremy led Mary inside, closing the door.

 

„It's late,“ he responded, staring in her eyes. „Can I take you somewhere where we can talk tomorrow?“

 

„Of course, you can. We need to talk. There's so much we need to make clear,“ her heart clenched as she recalled the Monday scene.

 

„It's true,“ he nodded. „I should go. I'll pick you up tomorrow at two p.m. if it's OK.“

 

„It is,“ she attempted to smile. She was happy to see him.

 

„OK. Good night,“ he took his eyes off hers, turned around and made his way to his car. He gave her a long gaze before he jumped in his car and drove away.

 

She was standing there till his car disappeared out of her sight with her heart pounding in her chest.

 

*

 

Eric drove across the city and stopped at the familiar place in Lake Sumter Landing in front of the restaurant Lighthouse Point where they were together the last time.

 

„Don't you mind being here?“ he looked at her before they got out of the car.

 

„Not at all. It's beautiful here.“

 

They walked next to each other to a boardwalk. „I'm sorry for what happened on Monday, Eric,“ she glanced at him. „I didn't like those guys at the first sight.“

 

„Why didn't you tell me about it? You can't imagine how bad I feel. If you wanted to punish me, you succeeded,“ he said bitterly. He stepped to the banister, leaning his elbows against it, staring at the water surface of the lake.

 

„I didn't want anything like that,“ she stopped next to him. „I couldn't tell you,“ she sighed.

 

„Just tell me why?“ he straightened, looking in her eyes. „I would have come back immediately.“

 

„Exactly. I supposed you'd never come back,“ she started speaking slowly and calmly. „I didn't want to ruin your plans, Eric. I didn't want you to come back because feeling oblligated,“ she shook her head. „When I found out I was pregnant... I wanted the baby. The child was the only thing that was left for me after your departure,“ she brushed her hand against her forehead.

 

„You didn't even tell me when I returned,“ he frowned. He averted his eyes, staring ahead.

 

„You came back after all those years, you couldn't have expected me to throw my arms around your neck. Think about it. I didn't think you would return,“ she paused. „I wasn't sure if you wouldn't disappear again,“ she said softly. „I couldn't rely on that you staying here.“

 

„But I missed her first steps, first smiles... everything. I'll never see her as a baby, I'll never hold her in my arms, Lena. Did you think about it?“ he turned to her sharply.

 

„Many times,“ she responded firmly. „Believe me that I thought about it every time I felt her move in my belly and also when she was born. She reminded me of you every time I held her in my arms. For all those years she didn't allow me to forget about you.“ Her eyes glistened with tears, formed in her eyes. „You're not the only one who was hurt, Eric.“

 

He said nothing. He looked at her, his eyes sad. „I made a big mistake that it's impossible to fix,“ he whispered. „I'm desperate, Lena. I don't know what to do,“ he shrugged. „When I returned... I was convinced that I could make the wrong right, that I could make it up to you for all those years I had been gone. But this...,“ he ran his hands over his face. „How can I look in her eyes and tell her 'I'm your daddy.' when I wasn't here when she needed me?“ he broke off for a moment then he looked in her eyes again. „And you...,“ he swallowed thick. He wasn't able to continue speaking, feeling a lump in his throat.

 

„You can,“ she breathed out, almost feeling his pain.

 

„What do you mean? She'll hate me,“ he shook his head, lowering his eyes.

 

„Frankly, I'm not sure what she thinks or what she feels. But I'm convinced she wanted to tell you... that day,“ she touched his shoulder.

 

„Does she know... that...,“ he looked up at her and she nodded.

 

„I told her on Sunday.“ He lifted his eyebrows, staring at her in shock. „I had an intention to tell you,“ she gave him a small smile. „I noticed that you two had grown close. She likes you.“

 

„And what was her reaction?“ he asked, curious, still in shock.

 

„First she ran outside and hid herself in the garden. Then I found her on the back porch talking to Mary. She had about a thousand questions,“ she laughed lightly. „We tried to explain her everything.“

 

He nodded. „She wanted to tell me...and my brother...,“ he cleared his throat.

 

„He completely ruined everything. I can imagine how you felt when you left. I could almost feel your pain, Eric,“ she covered her mouth with her hand, fighting tears. „The other day Fred told me you didn't want to talk to me,“ she closed her eyes for a moment. „I was afraid of losing you again.“

 

He turned to her, taking her hand. „You know... I did a lot of thinking these last days. It had to be hard for you to raise Ellie on your own. I realized it was primarily my fault. If I hadn't left you... nothing would have happened,“ he stroked her cheek. „I'll never leave you again unless you didn't want me to. I swear,“ he kept looking in her eyes. „I'm so in love with you, my guardian angel. You showed me what was life about even though you weren't with me. You gave me a lesson to remember.“

 

She cupped his face. „You're stubborn. You punished yourself. I don't ever want you to leave again,“ she touched her lips to his. „because I love you.“

 

He pulled her closer to hug her. She closed her eyes, wrapping her arms around him, stroking his back. She melted in his arms, feeling the warmth of his body. It felt like all those years separating them disappeared.

 

*

 

„Where is Ellie?“ Lena asked Mary as she walked in the kitchen.

 

„She's outside, why are you asking?“ Mary turned to her.

 

Lena winked at her, putting her finger on her lips. She returned to the front door, opening them. „Come in. She's outside,“ she took Eric's hand and pulled him inside.

 

Mary stepped to him as he walked in the kitchen and hugged him. „Oh boy..,“ she whispered. „Are you OK?“ she pulled back to look in his eyes.

 

„Not really,“ he smiled faintly, glancing through the window to the garden. „I'm nervous.“

 

„Don't worry,“ Lena squeezed his shoulder. „Perhaps she'll need some time but everything's going to be alright.“

 

„I hope,“ he nodded. „I'm going to start cooking.“

 

„Good idea. He promised to make spaghetti for dinner,“ Lena smiled at Mary.

 

„Oh... sounds good. Ellie loves it,“ Mary patted his upper arm.

 

Eric started moving around the kitchen and Lena stayed with him to help. Mary watched them for a few minutes then she retreated outside.

 

*

 

„When will my mom come home?“ Ellie climbed the stairs on the back porch.

 

„I think she's already at home,“ Mary looked up from her knitting.

 

„Really?“ Ellie caught a scent. „Oh yes, I can smell something delicious,“ she smirked. „I'm going to take a look,“ she ran inside.

 

Mary nodded and crossed her fingers for Eric in her thoughts.

 

„Mom, I didn't hear you to come...,“ Ellie halted in the kitchen doorway as she spotted Eric.

 

He turned to her. „Hi Ellie.“ They stared in each other's eyes for a few seconds. Eric felt his heart beating like crazy when Ellie frowned, turned around and ran upstairs.

 

„It's OK, Eric, she'll be back,“ Lena said softly, seeing his disappointment.

 

„Do you think so?“ he resumed stirring the sauce, lowering his eyes to it.

 

„Sure. She didn't expect to see you here,“ Lena put the pot of spaghetti aside and started setting the table.

 

Eric turned his attention to the meal and poured the sauce onto spaghetti. Then he stirred everything together. „Done.“ She pulled plates out of the cupboard and he put spaghetti on them.

 

„Dinner is on the table,“ Lena shouted, standing at the staircase.

 

They were sitting at the table when Ellie finally walked in. She sat down and they started eating in a silence.

 

„Mmmm, it's delicious, isn't it?“ Lena mumbled with her mouth full, glancing at Ellie. She could see her daughter liked it, too.

 

„It is,“ Mary aligned with Lena, smiling.

 

Ellie was staring at her plate, eating, without looking up. Eric sighed in his mind but stayed silent.

 

After dinner Lena collected the dishes and Eric helped her to put them in the dishwasher. „I should go,“ he said when they finished.

 

„Don't give up on her, Eric. She needs to process it,“ she touched his hair. „Maybe you should come tomorow afternoon and try to talk to her.“

 

„You're right. I'll come,“ he looked in her eyes. „I won't give up, don't worry. Thanks for your support.“

 

„You're welcome.“

 

He kissed her on the cheek gently. „See you tomorrow.“ He left.

 

„What are you doing here? I know about you,“ Lena said loudly.

 

Ellie who was standing hidden behind the door, walked in. „How do you know about me?“

 

„Did you overhear what we were talking about?“ Lena put her hands akimbo, looking at her daughter. „It's not polite.“

 

„No,“ Ellie shook her head, her face serious, „I wanted a good night kiss.“

 

„Really?“ Lena lifted her eyebrow suspiciously.

 

„Sure. I didn't want to disturb you and.... you,“ she corrected herself.

 

„OK. You should go to bed. I'm going with you,“ Lena took her hand and led her upstairs.

 

„Why did he leave?“ Ellie whispered as Lena pulled the blanket over her.

 

„Did you want him to stay?“ Lena answered with a question.

 

Ellie shrugged.

 

„If you did, you should have told him. You didn't looked happy to see him,“ Lena tapped Ellie's nose. „He'll come tomorrow afternoon,“ she said softly and kissed her daughter's forehead as Ellie yawned. „Good night.“

 

„Good night,“ Ellie mumbled, turning on her side, closing her eyes.

 

*

 

Mary answered the door as the door bell rang. Immediately Lena heard Ellie run down the staircase. She turned around but Ellie disappeared on the back porch.

 

„Hi Lena,“ Eric stepped closer and kissed her cheek.

 

„I'll be in my room, you two,“ Mary smiled and retreated to her bedroom.

 

Lena nodded at her and turned her attention to Eric. „Hi, how are you? Would you like a mug of coffee?“ she asked and poured coffee into two mugs. She handed him one.

 

„Thanks. I'm fine... I hope,“ he took a sip from his mug.

 

„Ellie's outside,“ she moved to the living room.

 

„Do you think I should go after her? I'm not sure,“ he followed and settled on the armrest of the armchair she sat down.

 

„I have a feeling that she's expecting you to do it,“ Lena smiled. „She ran out of the house as the door bell rang.“

 

„Well...,“ he put the mug on the table and got up, „... then I should try not to disappoint her this time around,“ he shrugged.

 

She took his hand, squeezing it.

 

Eric peeked outside. Ellie was sitting there, drawing something. She looked adorable as she focused on what she was doing, her tongue slightly sticking out of her mouth.

 

„Hi,“ he greeted her. He sat down on the chair. „I don't want to disturb you.“

 

„Hi,“ she glanced at him.

 

„What are you drawing? It looks like a house,“ he remarked.

 

„It is,“ she put down the coloured pencil and looked at him. „Why were you gone for so long?“

 

He held his breath, he didn't expect so straightforward question. „Why? Do you really want to hear it?“ He continued when she seriously nodded. „Because I was stupid, Ellie. I'm so sorry. I should have never left,“ he brushed his hand over his face.

 

„My mom says that every one makes mistakes sometimes,“ she stated.

 

„She's right, Ellie. But what I did was a huge mistake,“ he sighed. „You know... I believe that the day I met your mom, a sign was sent to me. The sign that my life could be better. But I didn't listen to it. I'll never make the same mistake again,“ he looked at her. „Do you know what I mean? I'm not sure if you can understand me.“

 

She nodded slowly. „I think I can. You love my mom and want to stay and never leave again?“

 

He smiled faintly. „Exactly. Your mom is my guardian angel,“ he broke off. „Can you forgive me, please?“

 

Ellie was staring at him, seeing moisture in his eyes as he averted them. She reached out to touch his hand. „Are you crying?“

 

He shook his head no without looking up.

 

Feeling his emotion she slid down from the bench and climbed up on his knees. „Daddy, don't cry, can you hear me?“ she wrapped her arms around him, putting her head on his chest. „I forgive you.“

 

Surprised by the word 'daddy' coming from her mouth, he caressed her back and kissed her on the crown of her head. „Thank you, my little girl,“ he held her in his arms and the warmth of her tiny body embraced him. „You can't imagine how much I love you.“

 

„I love you, too,“ she pulled back to look at him. „Do you want to see something?“

 

„Of course I do,“ he let her go, wiping his eyes.

 

„Stay here,“ she patted his arm, slid down and ran inside. In no time she was back, a picture in her hand. „Look,“ she handed him the picture and climbed back on his lap.

 

He placed his arm around her shoulders, staring at the picture of himself. There was written in the right lower corner MY DADDY. „Wow, it's me!“ he smiled.

 

Lena walked outside and sat down on the bench, watching them. She didn't say anything, she just kept looking.

 

„I drew it at preschool,“ Ellie said proudly, glancing at Lena.

 

Lena gave her a small smile. „The task was: 'Draw something what you wanted for a long time and got it in the end',“ she said softly.

 

„It's beautiful. You'll be a painter one day, won't you?“ he stroked Ellie's hair.

 

„Maybe. I don't know yet,“ she shrugged. „I drew it for you.“

 

„Thank you. It's amazing,“ he winked.

 

Lena could see his eyes shining. She could feel what he was feeling. She was glad that Ellie embraced him in the end, looking happy, sitting on his lap, her face shining like the sun.

 

*

 

„It's time to go to bed, Ellie,“ Lena walked outside after she cleaned up the kitchen after dinner. Eric stayed with them for the rest of the day and was playing a board game with Ellie on the back porch.

 

„No, already? It's Saturday,“ Ellie pursed her lips, disappointed.

 

„It's almost eight. You're up longer than other days,“ Lena insisted, shaking her head.

 

„Mom's right, Ellie. And I should go,“ he got up. „I'm going to help you to put the game away, what you say?“

 

„And will you read a fairy tale for me?“ she glanced at him and started putting the game into the box. „Why you have to go? Can't you stay here?“

 

„Um... yes, I'll read a fairy tale for you,“ he said slowly.

 

Feeling his embarrassment Lena ruffled Ellie's hair. „Too many questions, young lady. Your daddy can come tomorrow again to spend some time with you. He has his own apartment in Villages, you know?“

 

„But... I don't understand why he should leave again,“ her eyes darted from Lena to Eric. „I thought he'll stay my daddy forever.“

 

Eric took her in his arms, seeing tears forming in her eyes. „But Ellie, I'm your daddy forever. Don't worry,“ he stroked her hair. „I'll come tomorrow and we can go for a walk or stay here doing whatever you wish.“

 

„You promise?“ she wiped her eyes, frowning.

 

„Sure I promise. I'll never leave you.“ She wrapped her arms around his neck and held on for dear life. He burried his face in her hair, overwhelmed by emotions.

 

„Put her in bed,“ Lena touched his shoulder. „I'm going to make some coffee and wait here,“ she gave him a smile.

 

Eric nodded and walked inside with Ellie in his arms.

 

*

 

Walking in Ellie's room he sat down on the bed. „You should change your clothes, Ellie,“ he said softly. He pulled away gently to look at her.

 

She let him go hesitantly and he helped her to change into her pajamas. Then he took a book lying on her bedside table. „What fairy tale is your favorite?“ he asked, stroking her cheek.

 

She opened the book, flipping through the pages. „This one,“ she handed him the book.

 

„OK,“ he smiled and started reading.

 

She watched his face as he changed voices and her eyes slowly closed as she drifted to sleep listening to him. When he heard her breathing deep, he put the book aside, kissed her on the cheek and left the room noiselessly. He watched her for a few seconds before he closed the door.

 

*

 

„Eric's putting Ellie in bed, right?“ Mary took a seat beside Lena.

 

„Yes, he did,“ Lena smiled. „She held on him as if she never wanted to let go.“

 

„It's great to see they love each other, isn't it?“ she put her hand on Lena's.

 

„Yes, it is. Probably I should offer him to move to us. What do you think?“ Lena looked at her, unsure.

 

„It depends on what you think, Lena. It's obvious that he belongs to you two. I would love to see you live together as a family,“ Mary nodded her head. „But it's your life.“ Mary got up. „I'll go to my room. You should talk to him about it.“ She retreated inside.

 

Lena was lost in her thought when he joined her.

 

„She's sleeping.“

 

„It's good. She had to be tired, today was a long day for her,“ she glanced at him. „Here's your coffee,“ she pushed a mug towards him. „We should talk about... what's next,“ she offered in a low voice.

 

„Thanks,“ he sipped from his mug. „Do you mean...?“

 

„I thought about Ellie's words. Of course it's up to you but you should stay...,“ she cleared her throat.

 

„Do you think I could live here with you?“ he took her hand.

 

„I do. I'll leave it up to you to make a decision,“ she looked at him as he squeezed her hand.

 

„I'll think about it. I know it's Ellie's wish but do you really want the same?“ he put his hand on her cheek.

 

„Mmmm hmmm,“ she raised her eyes to him.

 

„Are you sure?“

 

„I am,“ she said firmly, closing her eyes, melting under his touch. „I missed you,“ she whispered.

 

„My sweet angel,“ he pulled her closer and wrapped his arms around her.

 

„Will you stay with me... tonight?“ she pulled back to look in his eyes, drowning in them.

 

He kissed her gently and slightly nodded. Then he stood up, pulling her up with him. His lips parted as if he wanted to say something but he changed his mind. He took her hand, leading her inside and upstairs to her bedroom.

 

*

 

Eric closed the door behind them. Placing his arm around her waist he pulled her closer, slipping his hand in her hair. She cupped his face and kissed him. „I'm really glad you're back, Eric,“ she whispered.

 

„Thanks for saying it,“ he started kissing her, slipping his hand under her top. She parted her lips feeling his tongue on the seam of them and sighed in his mouth as he unclasped her bra and cupped her breast.

 

She pulled back, taking off her top and shrugging down her bra while he pulled her jeans with her panties down her legs. He took her in his arms and put her on the bed. Then he quickly got rid of his own clothes and laid himself down next to her. She sneaked her arms around his neck immediately, her lips capturing his. It felt so good to touch him again. As they separated to catch their breaths he looked at her naked body for a few moments, feasting his eyes on her. „You're so beautiful,“ he said reverently before his mouth clung to one of her nipples while his hand ran over her body to her most intimate place, stroking her clit.

 

She moaned, her hand playing with his hair. Caressing his chest down to his belly her other hand found his length, stroking it in desire to give him some pleasure as well. She held her breath as he slipped with his finger in her warm core. It took a few minutes till she bit her lips, fisting his hair as her orgasm washed over her body.

 

As the wave of pleasure faded away she pushed him on his back. Feeling he was close she took him in her mouth. In a few minutes he spilled in it, moaning, his hands in her hair.

 

He pulled her up to him. She smiled and brushed her nose against his bearded cheek, positioning herself on top of him, pressing her body to his so she could feel him hardening again. She rose her body and straddled him. Running his hands over her thighs to her hips he lifted her slightly to line up himself with her. She leaned her hands against his chest and pushed down. Moaning at the sensation feeling him inside she tilted her head back. Then she started riding him slowly, lifting her hands to her hair to give him the sight of her body.

 

He watched her, his eyes narrowed, his hand on her breast, on her thigh the other. Wanting more he flipped them over without slipping out. She placed her hands on his chest, looking in his eyes. He leaned over, supporting himself on his hands, and kissed her. Then he started thrusting inside her and she squeezed his upper arms, arching her body against him. She closed her eyes, enjoying the union of their bodies, moaning. She felt happy thanks to the feeling of having him so close after all those years. It was overwhelming to feel his power as he slammed inside her with full force. She perceived his moans, his breath, his hair tickling her face. With a few more thrusts they fell over the edge together and she cried out, tears flowing down from the corners of her eyes.

 

He collapsed on top of her, stroking her hair, panting. She wrapped her arms around his neck, caressing his back. Hearing her sobs he slipped out of her, rolling off of her, pulling her closer. She snuggled up to him, her hand on his chest.

 

„I hope I didn't hurt you,“ he said softly, kissing her on the crown of her head.

 

„No, you didn't,“ she raised her head to him, wiping her eyes.

 

„You're crying,“ he stroked her cheek with the back of his hand.

 

„Because I'm happy. You were... amazing,“ she smiled in tears that started flowing down again. „There wasn't any other guy after you. Do you believe me?“

 

„I do,“ he lowered his eyes. „I'd like to say I was faithful to you the whole time,“ he made a pause before he continued. „I've been... since the moment at that I realized I was not able to love anyone else and that I missed you so much.“

 

She put her hand on his cheek. „Don't worry about it, Eric. It's over,“ she shook her head. „I had Ellie. You were all alone.“

 

He put his hand on hers, lifting it to his mouth and pressed a kiss in her palm. „I love you, my guardian angel. Thank you for forgiving me. I appreciate it very much,“ he was looking in her eyes. „There's not another woman like you in the world. Now I know it and I promise not to leave you ever again. Having you in my arms is like coming home.“

 

„I love you, too. I feel the same, my love. Frankly, it had to be hard to return without knowing what awaited you here,“ she kept caressing his chest, looking at him.

 

„You're right,“ he nodded. „I didn't expect you to stay single. I was afraid of coming back. But...,“ he lifted his eyebrows, „... I was not only given a second chance, I was sent another sign in form of my daughter,“ he swallowed, overwhelmed by emotions.

 

She smiled, pecked him on his chin and rubbed his beard. „Then you should be a really good boy from now on.“

 

„I always will be,“ he cupped her face and kissed her lips.